Heide Wright with father Werner

During her ten year battle with anorexia Heide knew her own strength was not enough

After thirty hospital admissions, for up to 7 months at a time, twice forced to have a naso-gastric tube, Heide Wright has finally lost her affection for the anorexia that became “like a best friend”.

“Even though I hated every minute of living with the illness and the torment that I would undergo, there was also a tremendous fear to let go,” Heide explains.

Heide’s battle began at age 16. Once dropping to just 29kg, her weight would only rarely tip above 35kg, even with drugs and drip feeds in hospital.

On top of this condition, Heide also battled with obsessive compulsive disorder, depression and anxiety, all of which greatly hampered her treatment.

“Often I battled with all four at once. It was horrible, I am unable to describe in words the trauma I went through and the desperation I felt.”

Even while in hospital, she would go to great lengths to avoid a meal or trick the nurse into thinking she had eaten.

“My O.C.D. meant I also pushed all the boundaries to make sure my ‘routine’ was complete. I was not a nice person if anyone tried to stand in my way.

“It was all driven by fear and I hated what I had become but I was unable to turn myself around.”

When she was 24, all treatment avenues now exhausted, Heide moved to Melbourne to study.

“I was frightened and even though the hospitals never helped me emotionally, they did at least keep me alive.

“My fear led me to start attending a church that I felt drawn to in some way.

“I began listening to God’s Word through the sermons and also began reading the Bible at home. I had never known how powerful and relevant the Scriptures could be to my life in this day! I really felt God speaking to me and I longed for more.

“I still struggled with anorexia but a tiny fire had begun to burn in my heart.”

As a 15-year-old, Heidi attended a Christian youth conference, and the message given impacted her greatly.

“I felt a prompting from God to ask Jesus to come live in my heart. I asked for forgiveness of my sins and acknowledged that Jesus died on the cross for me.”

But now, as Heide began reading her Bible again, she realised why she still struggled with anorexia.

“One night, I came across a verse, 1 Corinthians 6, verse 191 Corinthians 6, verse 19, that hit me like a ton of bricks.

“Do you not know that your bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore, honour God with your bodies” (1 Corinthians 6, verse 191 Corinthians 6, verse 19).

“I knew God was referring to the anorexia and that I was putting it before Him. But how do I change? I had tried so many times in my own strength but, of course, my strength alone was never enough.”

Heidi knew God was directing her to be baptised in water, to publicly demonstrate her commitment to the Lord Jesus Christ, and affirm her belief that God had made her a new person.

“After this, my faith became even stronger and God spoke to me more and more. My pastor David, a beautiful and kind man, guided me through my recovery. He became my ‘spiritual dad’ and I will always be grateful for his patience, time, help and love.”

Besides overcoming anorexia, Heidi also dreamed of marriage and children.

“I was always so afraid no man could ever love me and the doctors also said I probably would not be able to have children.

Luke and Heide with Arielle, Nathaniel and Josiah

“However, God promised me that if I let Him help me get better, He would provide me with a husband and children. My favourite Bible verse is “Delight yourself in the Lord and He will give you the desires of your heart” (Psalm 37:4Psalm 37:4). But the condition was only if I let Him help me get better.”

As Heide began to put on weight her depression began to deepen.

“I was unable to cope with my new body,” she remembers.

“I felt disgusting and worthless. So I cried out to God all the time and even get mad at Him at times, but He would still remain so patient with me. I made slow progress only because I depended on His strength.”

According to Heide, one way God delivered her was through poetry.

“God gave me a gift of poetry and He used my poems to help me understand I am His child, His princess and He loves me unconditionally, even when I get a little cranky.

“As Ephesians chapter 1 says, God has sealed me with the Holy Spirit, who lives in me, to guide and prompt me on what I should do. I can go to Him for reassurance and love all the time.”

Heide is now happily married to Luke, a diesel mechanic, and they live together in Perth with their three children.

“God promised me a ‘prince’ and have been married to Mr W-right for 6 years now. I love God’s sense of humour! We also have 3 beautiful children, Arielle, Nathaniel and Josiah and another blessing on the way and due in March.

“Oh God is faithful,” Heide concludes.

Heide has published a book of her poetry, entitled Bring Me Roses. This book, plus cards and magnets, are available from her Facebook fan page entitled ‘Bring Me Roses’, or you can