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Truthful and funny

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Sometimes our attempts to speak the truth turn out funny, like these sentences found on insurance claims:

  1. 'I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.'
  2. 'I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law and headed over the embankment.'
  3. 'In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.'
  4. 'I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident.'
  5. 'I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat I found that I had a fractured skull.'
  6. 'The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran him down.'
  7. 'I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by some stray cow.'
  8. 'A truck backed through my windshield into my husband's face.'
  9. 'The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit him.'
  10. 'I started to slow down but the traffic was more stationary than I thought.'

Such attempts at stating the truth are humorous because, obviously, they are the result of misplaced modifiers and faux pas, rather than deviousness, but nonetheless they highlight the struggle we all have in communicating accurately and helpfully.


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